Monday, March 30, 2015

Season 1 Episode 3: The Sad Story Of Henry

Our story begins with an engine who is afraid of rain. The Engine went a tunnel and refused to come out again. We find out our engine's name is Henry. 
Nope
His crew gets out and argue with him to get his booty out of the tunnel. Henry insists the rain is going to ruin his green paint with red stripes. It must be acid rain. For some reason his guard thinks it is going to work to blow his whistle and wave his flag at Henry. Doesn't the guard know that Henry is suffering from 'Gordon Syndrome'?
The Fat Controller rolls up in style.
AKA Sir Topham Hatt

The Fat Controller gets all up in Henry's face and threatens to pull him out. Henry just steams him. The Fat Controller goes all Russia on his passengers and makes them play TUG A WAR with Henry. And then he makes them push. The Fat Controller just stands on the side insisting his doctor forbids him. 
Geez dude, I don't know, don't you own like 200 engines? Maybe you should have an engine pull him out instead of your paying passengers who are probably already ticked because of your freaky talking engine crying over rain. I regress...
I'd be asking for a refund and my next trip on Edward

Finally Thomas comes along. He tries to push Henry but, Henry doesn't leave the tunnel. The Fat Controller has enough of this crud. He has a hard enough time with that turd, Gordon. He tells Henry, "He is going to block Henry in the tunnel FOREVER." Like a honey badger, Henry don't give a shat. 
Or maybe he does?

After sitting for awhile in train time out, Henry is starting to regret his life choices. Edward and Gordon often pass. Edward always says, "Peep peep." because he likes Peeps. 
Gordon says, "Poop, poop, poop." basically because he has a poopy attitude. 
Yes, you are a poop Gordon
Henry can't answer them due to not having a fire. And worst of all he finds that being in the tunnel has ruined his paint job. I would have dealt with the acid rain, Henry. Poor Henry is left in the tunnel wondering what will happen to him? I kind of know the feeling. My mother always forgot she had told me to stand in the corner.
FOREVER!








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