Season 5 Episode 2: Horrid Lorry

Looks like we are in for more Cranky fun. Today he is bitching at Percy for being late. Percy explains that he has been running late due to to all the work to do on the island. Cranky suggests that the engines should be replaced by lorries or trucks, for us Americans. Percy's eyes nearly rolled out of his head over the shock of such a suggestion. 

Don't worry there little guy, you can work on a Heritage Railroad.

Percy heads off to spread to gospel of Cranky to the other engines at the shed. They all dismiss Percy's fear. Unlike Percy, the know the show is called Thomas The Tank Engine and they aren't going anywhere. 

Soon enough, Percy's fears come true, 3 lorries appear. They were being unloaded from a ship in the harbor. 

Flying lorries!

Cranky nearly pees himself with glee over this. Percy arrives to be loaded up. Cranky starts to mock Percy that his job is gone. He then informs Percy that one of the lorries would like to have chat with him

The Lorry calls Percy a steaming pile of scrap iron and shoos him away. Percy was the most upset at being called this and rolls off.

You know he is a bad ass with his whiskers.

Percy then later sees Thomas and James. Another one of the lorries was laying into them. The lorry then turns his attention to Percy. He calls him a little green goblin on wheels and states that he will be scrapped. The lorry the drives off. 

Thomas starts to complain over the rudeness of the lorry. James agrees.

Someone should put sugar in his tank.

Meanwhile with little Toby, a lorry has arrived to harass him too. The lorry points out that Toby should be a museum. Toby replies with the very useful engine line we all know. The Lorry in which tells him to tootle along. Toby's driver breaks it up and sends Toby to the flour mill.

This is the angriest I ever seen Toby.

At the flour mill, Toby had found that he has been replaced there too. His driver decides to head out to the farms. He has an idea that they will be needed and loved there.

Toby's railway runs through a gorge. While Toby could go through, vehicles have to take a long winding road around. Toby had arrived at the gorge, he sees the lorry from the quarry with a load of rocks on the pass. The lorry was out of control. The lorry then drives off the road.

Toby's reaction was priceless.

I hope they don't pin me.

The lorry's driver was thrown from the vehicle. He obviously was not wearing a seat belt. How he survived is a good question.

He could have also been drunk too.

The lorry was taken to the docks to be recycled into a soda can, I presume. Percy sees the lorry at the dock and teases the lorry about being a steaming pile of scrap. The lorry insists he'll make a comeback.

Butch the tow truck, arrives with the lorry at the flour mill. Turns out this lorry had broke down from being overloaded. 

James arrives whistling, he had seen the third lorry on the barge. This one had reversed himself into the sea. 

Thomas then arrives to laugh at their misfortune. He calls them the "Brothers Grimm".

I would have called them, The Dip Shits.

The lorries never returned to the island. They are now being drank from and then recycled again. Maybe, one day they'll turn into an airplane and return. 

Season 5 Episode 1: Cranky Bugs

It's time to dig into season 5. And it starts with Thomas and Percy being in bad moods. It all has to do with a cranky crane named Cranky. (Yay, another angry soul on Sodor!) His main character trait is to complain and call Percy and Thomas, "useless little bugs". 

Aw Cranky, I kind of like you for picking on Thomas.

Cranky starts to give the two some business on where they position the trucks. This really grinds Thomas' gears. And he fights back. Cranky is not about to take any lip from a bug and he drops the load of wood he was carrying in front of Thomas and Percy. 

Oh shit!

Later in the day, the two engines met up with Gordon and James to narc on Cranky. Gordon replies with the most true thing ever stated on the island. He replies, "Cranes need attention, just like me." (Gordon knows he is fickle)

James seems to think it is due to Cranky being in the elements looking at Thomas and Percy being annoying and that is why he calls them bugs. And with that James nailed it.

James, you spoke and didn't annoy me. The world is ending.

Cranky hears about the conversation with James and Gordon and it quit pleased with the two of them agreeing with him. His ego had swelled and he then became even more bitter and bossy. 

Percy had become very upset over Cranky's attitude and he then looses his mind. He pushes some trucks closer to Cranky to load, all the while the crane is bitching at him. Percy pushed them too far ahead do to the rage boiling up in him. Cranky then dropped the cargo on Percy's head. (I really did laugh out loud.)

Thud!

Next up is Thomas to be creamed. Cranky demands that Thomas push his trucks on the outside tracks. Thomas begrudgingly does so. Cranky then drops the load right next to the trucks. (Really, what you did to Percy was a lot more eviler.) Cranky laughs and complains that Thomas knew better that he couldn't reach that line.

Thomas and Percy meet with The Fat Controller, who was angry at the confusion and delay. He rips apart Percy and Thomas over everything that happened. He then sends the two the shed to think about how they made Cranky's job difficult. (I never get why the engines never speak up for themselves when they are blamed for the pranks and accidents they didn't cause?)

That's the old Fat Controller we all love.

That night, a storm rolls in. Gordon, Duck, James, and Henry at stuck at the shed at the harbor. An old steamer ship is on the prowl running loose. It digs through the dock and heads right towards the shed the four are staying in. It collapses the shed and knocks down Cranky. 

This right here is why I am afraid of ships.

The Fat Controller arrives and ganders at the destruction. He decides to have Thomas and Percy head out to help put up Cranky. He'll then have Cranky dig out the other engines out of the shed.

But, I have a headache.

Cranky tells on himself to The Fat Controller. He admits that he was rude to Thomas and Percy all along. The Fat Controller, just now figuring out his mistake decides he owes Thomas and Percy an apology and a couple of kisses.

Thomas and Percy arrive at the scene. The two get Cranky on his feet. Cranky then began the job of clearing the shed. Once Cranky had the shed off the four engines, Gordon begins to kiss Cranky's ass. Cranky admits that he couldn't have done it with those b b b b b b uuuuuggg..... small engines. 

Cranky then rudely asks Thomas and Percy to move. Percy becomes uber pissed and moves while still attached to cranky. And once, again Cranky is on the ground. 

Percy that was the best move ever.

We end the story with Cranky still being cranky. But, he doesn't call them bugs anymore so, there's a positive.