Season 4 Episode 12: Steam Roller

Sir Handel has something he would like to show you. It's his wee little cute wheels. They literally keep him on track. The other engines make fun his wheels calling them, "Steam Roller Wheels." I just call them training wheels.

I got a brand new pair of roller skates.

Peter Sam assures Sir Handel that the other engines just don't understand sport performance parts like they do, since he rocks that funnel. 

Skarloey wants to introduce Sir Handel to his enemy, George The Steam Roller since they have similar wheels. And he thinks it would be funny to see Sir Handel met another not nice machine on Sodor. 

It just so happens that George is just off to the side.

There are so many wonderful personalities on Sodor.

They engines look over at George working. The whole time he is working he is complaining about how engines are a thing of the past. He wants all the rails turned into roads. George even has a chant for it. All he needs is a picket sign. 

Sir Handel takes the challenge. He waits to later that morning, while George is at a crossing. The two fight over who has the better steam roller wheels and a duel is drawn.

Do do do doo wah wah waaahh

A little later in the day Sir Handel comes back around the road. He sees good ol' Georgy boy working away. He gets up next him and tries to peep him out f the way. But, George ignores him. The two ride side by side since the road was so tight. They throw insults across at each other, until George's road rage kicked in. He deliberately rammed into Sir Handel's train causing him to derail. 

That's just driving, here in Montana. 

The two nearly caused a gang war with the two crews on who's fault it was. Fortunately, before knives could be drawn a sexy police officer arrives and breaks it up. 

Did somebody call the police? *drops boombox*

The crews work together to clean the mess up and they even construct a fence along the road and the railway. George's crew take him away, after the fence was built. This give Sir Handel the idea he made George disappear. Sir Handel then turns into the bragging hero, driving the other engines nuts.

That awkward moment when you walk into a room and your coworkers are talking about you.

Sir Handel's victory didn't last long. A gang of boys arrive and start teasing him over the accident. They claim that the steam roller nearly beat him. This made Sir Handel sulk in silence on the subject of steam rollers.

Who let's their kids hang around heavy machinery like that? Or what railway does?

Season 4 Episode 11: Special Funnel

Ahoy winter time! Our boy, Peter Sam is creeping along the line. And he is still banged up from his wreck. His funnel is dangling in the wind. 

Peter Sam carries onward home where, the other engines make fun of his wonky funnel. (I personally think it is okay. Some people just hang a little to one side.) Peter Sam explains that his manager ordered him a new and improved one. He is just waiting for it to arrive.

Oh my gosh, is that Duke? I thought he disappeared again.

The weather turns for the worst. The wind is picking up and the rain is washing out the lines.  Rusty and the crew are working hard to clear the lines. He gets notice that they are needed, a bunch of branches has destroyed a bridge. The job takes a long to time complete. (Sometimes, these stories at some pointless subplot in them and it drives me crazy.)

And they all hope it doesn't turn into the viaduct again.

Finally, it is fixed and Peter Sam carefully takes his coaches over the bridge. Next he heads towards the tunnel. He comes out the other end only to find that he poked his funnel out with an icicle. 

Don't lie you did it with a BB gun.

Peter Sam heads off again without his funnel. The crew finds that without his funnel, Peter Sam is giving them the black lung with his smoke. They spot an old drain pipe on the side of the track and they rope it to his head. 

This just turned kinky.

Peter Sam arrives back to the sheds, where all the other engines begin to make fun of him. Sir Handel even turns into Justin Bieber and belts out a song about for us.

They continued teasing him for what seems like years, until his new funnel arrived. The Fat Controller presents to him the best funnel you'll ever see. 

What the....?

Peter Sam is skeptical of this funnel, it seems flat. The Fat Controller assures that if he waits and see, he'll find out it's a sport funnel.

Peter Sam goes on a run, trying out his new sports package. It works so well for him that all the other narrow gauge engines are super jelly of him. So jealous we end with Skaloey, Rhenesas, and Sir Handel looking butt hurt.

My lovely engine lumps.

Season 4 Episode 8: Trucks

Harold the snob, is out looking for tourists who are injured in the mountains. He is just about to head home when a tiny diesel catches his eyes. He stops and introduces himself. The diesel states that he is, Rusty and The Fat Controller sent for him. 

The two then break it up. Rusty heads off to The Top Station.

Does Rusty come off as a girl to anyone else?

Peter Sam and Sir Handel have been waiting for Rusty arrive. And of course, Sir Handel is in his mood. He begins to bump trucks about. Oh and guess what? The trucks want revenge on him.

Gordon puffs up next to Sir Handel. He tells Sir Handel to play hooky so, he doesn't have to shunt truck. Sir Handel loves this idea. 

The next morning, he does just that. No one had the time to bust him so, Peter Sam again takes on extra work for him. 

James did it better.

Peter Sam takes off with some of Sir Handel's coaches for the day. While Rusty follows with the rest. 

At the station, Peter Sam drops off his coaches. He then hitches to the back of Rusty's train. 

They head off to drop their load off. There they have their trucks filled with rocks, they are filled with rocks on top of a slope. The trucks are then sent down.

Sometimes, it is just easier to post the picture.

Peter Sam is at the bottom waiting for his trucks. The trucks who are as colored blind as me, think it is Sir Handel down at the bottom and begin their revenge.

They headed down the mountain as fast as they could. The empty trucks tried to shout out that they were mistaken. But, it was too late. The chains snap and the loaded carts go flying. 

Peter Sam sat at the bottom with his eyes shut, waiting for his faith. 

Or he is sneezing.

And holy My Little Pony, truck go flying everywhere. Peter Sam is covered with debris. 

Luckily, Rusty was close by. He worked at clearing the wreckage. 

Asshat trucks!

Once Peter Sam was free, he was in horrible shape. Poor Peter Sam, limps home. (Why is it, that the good engines always seem to have wrecks?)

At the shed, Sir Handel apologizes. Peter Sam, rightfully so, was still angry at him. 

Let it all out Peter Sam.

As he always does, The Fat Controller came out of no where. He commands that Sir Handel now has to take on Peter Sam's work as well as his own. 

Meanwhile with Rusty, he was beginning to head home when he meets up with Harold again. They congratulate each other on being awesome and they both head their separate ways. 

Oh Harold, you annoy me.

Season 4 Episode 7: Peter Sam and The Refreshment Lady

First of all, sorry for not posting for awhile. I have had a very busy week last week. My husband was off getting scans for his cancer and all that fun stuff. But, I am back and snarking. I also started a second snark blog that I will be trying to update every Monday. This blog is call Kidiasters. It is going to hit on a random kiddie show every week and giving them the snark down. I went a little more into snarking on my first post over there then, I usually give Thomas. Just a warning. So, speaking of Thomas let's get on with it.

Peter Sam is now picking up the slack of Sir Handel being in engine time out. Doing this made Peter Sam very excitable. The site of Peter Sam enjoying himself makes Sir Handel jealous, as he is bored and lonely in the shed all the day. 

Before Peter Sam headed off to work, Skarloey warned him to keep calm. But, who listens to Skarloey?

At least you got the one with the roof.

Peter Sam collects his coaches and then heads off on the track. He wanted to go fast but, he was being slowed down by something. When Peter Sam pulled into the station, Henry was waiting for him. 

Just kidding, it was Gordon in disguise. 

Henry was pissy once Peter Sam arrived. He complains about if Peter Sam is late again tonight, he is going to abandon ship and leave the passengers stranded. (It must be Gordon!)

Peter Sam heads off again. We see wee little Peter Sam heading across the mountains and the coaches falling in love with him. 

Peter Sam arrives at a station near the lake. Here they have to wait an hour. This is where Peter Sam's crew take an hour to slack and stuff their faces at a shop run by the sexy and gorgeous refreshment lady. 

My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard.

The hour is up and Peter Sam is impatient to get going again. He is really worried about missing Henry/Gordon hybrid's train. By being impatient, he leaves behind the refreshment lady. The coaches yell at Peter Sam to get his attention. Peter Sam stops and let's the woman on.

No one leaves The Refreshment Lady.

Peter Sam hurries to make up lost time. (You know if this was the airline, they would say, "Screw you, refreshment lady! That will be $500.00 to rebook you.")

Peter Sam arrives just in time to catch Henry. The two of them are happy for a moment. But, that is all over when the refreshment lady lectures Peter Sam. 

No Sweet Tea for you!

Peter Sam apologizes and explains that Henry made him nervous. The refreshment lady reminds Peter Sam that Henry is a guaranteed connection, he leaves no one behind. Henry sneaks off before Peter Sam can toot angrily at him. 

What a sneaky snake.

Season 4 Episode 6: A Bad Day for Sir Handel

Skarloey and Rhenesas are sitting next to each other speaking with their crews about how they are aging. A crew member drops a bomb about 2 new engines coming in to help the old men. (Wait, a second the episodes are out of order. Ugh, I already have issues keeping these Narrow Gauge Engines straight!) 

Don't mock me Rhenesas.

Sir Handel and Peter Sam arrive. Sir Handel immediately starts bitching about the amenities. Peter Sam plays good cop and insists it is nice. Sir Handel then turns his attention to Skarloey who is sitting under the awning by the shed. He then complains about Skarloey looking like rubbish. (Sir Handel you just won me over. You're hilarious!) 

Peter Sam tries to make excuses for Sir Handel's behavior. Instead of being insulted Skarloey just feels bad for Peter Sam because, he is like a prissy pmsing teenage girl.

Please don't get us killed, Sir Handel.

Sir Handel's firman interrupts Sir Handel's great insults to inform him that he needs to get work. Sir Handel whines about being tired and insists that Peter Sam should do it. But, oh no this fireman is having none of that and forces him to go.

Sir Handel gathers his coaches. He of course, has to insult them too. Sir Handel calls them cattle trucks. The coaches call Sir Handel as they see him, a jag off. 

Sir Handel heads to the platform and there is another engine with ego, Gordon. Sir Handel introduces himself to Gordon. Sir Handel tries to make himself important to Gordon by putting himself in the same league as him. He is even too much for Gordon to handle.

Someone who is more egotistical them me?!

Sir Handel sets off on his line going through the mountain passes. He hits the top station and is still in his pissy mood. He wanted to rest but, his driver wants to get some trucks from the quarry. Sir Handel totally looses it and refuses to work. 

He comes up with the idea of causing trouble to get out of it. (Just like Gordon!) He derails himself.

Maybe this is what is going on with Amtrak?

Peter Sam heads up with some workmen and The Fat Controller. (Uh oh) The Fat Controller must have been taken away from his iced bun again because, he just leaves with, "I'll talk to you later." 

Later that evening, when Sir Handel heads home, The Fat Controller is waiting. He lays in on Sir Handel with the fury of the devil. He then puts Sir Handel in "engine time out" in the shed.

It's bad enough I have to deal with you too. I have a gazillion other misbehaving engines to look after.

Season 4 Episode 5: Four Little Engines

May I now introduce you to, Skarloey and Rhenesas. They work with the engines formally known as Stuart and Falcon. (Yes, Stuart and Falcon are now, Peter Sam and Sir Handle. ) The four engines work on the Skarloey railway.

Enough of that right now, I see total hottie Edward. 

Edward it has been so long.

The Fat Controller is speaking to Edward. He decides that Edward needs to go to The Works. 

Edward heads off to The Works, there he finds Skarloey. Edwards asks about why Skarloey is there. Skarloey give a sad tale about being put to rest in the shed and missing his bro, Rhenesas. Rhenesas was being mended.

Some strange men arrived to abduct Edward, leaving Skarloey alone. 

And here is Thomas, video bombing.

Meanwhile, we check in with Sir Handel. It seems he is having trouble with his coaches. They are kind of like trucks and don't trust him. 

While heading down his line, he encounters sheep on the rails.

I don't know if anyone saw that video where a cow gets is face destroyed by a train? But this is giving me flashbacks of that. 

Sir Handel stops the train before he mutilates any sheep faces. The coaches take it as Sir Handel has bumped them on purpose and swear to pay him back. So, they push him off the rails. 

No sheep were injured and Sir Handel was put on the rails. He was then sent to the shed. His driver wonder how is suppose to take care of a visitor train when Sir Handel has been put in time out?

Skarloey peeps up asking if can do it?

I am needy!

Skarloey suckers the driver into taking him out. He heads out to gather the nasty coaches for the job. Skarloey then lectures them about being jag offs.

Meh, whatever!

Skarloey then heads off. He cheerfully stops at all the stops. It was all cool until the line started to get a little steep for him. Skarloey began to literally loose steam. His driver says in a very Mister Roger's voice to "Take his time."

Skarloey starts to head down the hill. He begins to break up. One of his springs break and he rides sideways down the hill.

Gangsta style!

They stop Skarloey. The crew wants to get a bus but, Skarloey pleads that he'll do it. (What will happen?)

Meanwhile, at the platform, James is waiting. Skarloey pulls up all sideways with the coaches. They two engines exchange passengers. 

Everyone was excited and thankful for Skarloey. Skarloey is told that he is going to mended up and looking beautiful. Because he is a hero!

My little lopsided engine.

Season 4 Episode 4: You Can't Win

So, we are still going on about Duke since he is the hero of all the engines. Duke in this story, is sick. His crew was cleaning his tubes, (That sounds nasty) when Stuart pops in. Duke tries to hide the fact that he is screwed up. Stuart calls Duke "old" and Duke heads off.

It was like engine pneumonia.

Duke didn't stay mad long. All he had to do is have his face plate switched to happy. His mood didn't last long though, as he approached a hill he started to get his old man wheeze on. 

He managed to make it up the hill and make it to the station. Duke's driver gets out and inspects his engine. The passengers wait on the side for the news.

They ranged from concerned to angry.

The driver informs the passengers that Duke will take them to the harbor with the help of two other engines. 

Falcon and Stuart come to the rescue. Falcon hitches on the front and and Stuart hitches on the behind. The three head off like a human centipede to the harbor.

They reached the next station and they split up the duties. Falcon took off with the passengers to the harbor. Stuart moves to the front the help Duke. Of course, he rubs it in.

Well of course, you're the front of the centipede.

Stuart kept it up the point that Duke wanted to pay him back. Duke and his driver schemed the payback. They waited until they reached the hill and Duke pushed full steam, showing Stuart that he still had it.

The two reached the next station, a boy asks, "Why there was two engines?"

The boy's father replies, "Stuart needed help."

This upsets Stuart. (Wait didn't this happen to James and Toby earlier? This is almost the same story!)

Dammit!

Turns out this was Duke's plan all along. Duke reminds him, that he is old and will always win.

Season 4 Episode 3: Bulldog

Percy is being a James, he just received a new coat of paint and he wants everyone to see. He also is very upset with his driver. He thinks he is late even though it is the butt crack of dawn. The other engines, tell Percy to shut his pie hole. 

Thomas butts in and tells Percy to stop being impatient. He warns him that if he doesn't stop he is going to run into trouble and Duke won't be there to warn him. 

To point out, there is now a picture of Duke hanging on the wall in the shed.

Like a steam punk George Washington

Thomas goes into the story. Many years ago, back before Duke was locked in the shed. Falcon was young and impatient. He had a lot of learning to do. 

The manager pops in to inform Falcon he is going to learn the mountain road. This excites Falcon so much that his eyes roll in his head. The manger sends Falcon to get a new coat of paint and breaks the news that Duke will be teaching him.

What the fart?

The next day, Duke and Falcon are getting ready to set up and go. Duke states that he should go first. Falcon being stubborn, rants about how he should go first. Duke is just like whatever just look at the track, it's your fault if you die.

They set off. All the way up the pass, Duke reminds Falcon to look at the track. This irritates Falcon. (Oh man, what is going to happen?) 

The two approach a tunnel. The tunnel is so dark that Falcon and Duke can not see. They emerge out fine but, that was about to change. Falcon derails over a cliff, dangling like a cat toy.

Well, I saw this coming.

Duke held onto Falcon with all his might. And why wouldn't he? I am sure he would go off the cliff with him. Duke's crew work their magic with chain to hold up Falcon. But, they run into issues when the old man needs some water. 

Just so happens, that there was a workman's cottage right above the scene. (How convenient?) They start a bucket chain and fill up Duke.

And there goes the TripAdvisor rating.

With new energy provided by water, Duke turned into Hulk Hogan and pulled Falcon back on the tracks.

The two engines start off again. They arrive at the top station, where the manager is waiting. The passenger go on and on about what an awesome display Duke put on saving Falcon, calling him a bulldog. 

Falcon apologizes to Duke for being a cocky young bastard.  Duke just rolls it off as he didn't want him to ruin his new paint.

And I didn't want to go over the cliff.

Season 4 Episode 2: Sleeping Beauty

We continue The Grandpuff Saga. Thomas is once again back in the sheds telling the tale. But, first we have to go through everything that happened prior. You can read the prior post for your flashback.

Our story progresses to years. The Fat Controller receives some visitors who want to find Duke. They make a plan, to follow the old lines. 

The visitors included Doug Funnie and a young Michael Nesmith.

The search crew headed off to the mountains. They searched for days. And we get a montage that seems to last for days. 

Finally, this all ends when young Michael Nesmith falls through soft ground right into the shed.

We need this guy on MH 370.

Duke wakes up and immediately believes he being vandalized. The searchers explain that there are a lot worst things you can wake up to and that they are there to save him. *cough* Josh Duggar.

Duke is loaded up and shipped to his new home. Stuart and Falcon were thrilled to see the old man. They accidentally wake him while coming to greet him. Duke just complains about it, instead of being thrilled.

I can not wait until I am old and I can be grumpy for the hell of it.

"And that was our whole story." as Thomas says. This episode was mostly flashbacks and montages. That was easy.